Purpose is not decided
It is discovered
From starting in Detroit, to taking on the World
|
|
From starting in Detroit, to taking on the World
|
|
On July 10, 2016, I met the women I would eventually call my wife. During the Seita Scholars Program’s summer SET week, we instantly connected like we’ve known each other for years. Often, two former foster care youth being in a relationship can be disastrous with two individuals coming from traumatic situations seeking healing from the other, but our relationship was different. We accepted the trauma we both experienced in the past and embraced who we had become. Similar to the process of creating diamonds, we both lived through agonizing pressure and pain only to surface and shine brighter than the moonlight itself. The process of giving my love to her through the past two years has been even more beautiful. As I returned home from Seita’s SET week, one thought in particular came to my head, “I wonder how my family would react if I dated someone outside of my race?” It’s silly to even consider her race as an issue seeing that she has been so socially active for communities of color and has an open heart to learn more. During our week of being together I didn’t think much about it at all to be honest. I saw who she was spiritually and that was enough to confirm that she was a good person. After a few months of being friends, we eventually became a couple. Initially, I received great feedback from my family. Some black people can be caution of “White Allies” which we should be, but I believed they would eventually accept her as another member of the family simply because I loved her and she treated me well. On May 18, 2018, I decided to drop to one knee and propose to my best friend and my future wife while in Mindo, Ecuador. From the first week I knew her, I knew I would eventually make her my wife. I truly saw the person she was and not the stigmas that came with her skin color and she did the same with me. She uses her platform to dismantle hatred, racism, and bigotry while giving her life to God and I couldn’t ask more from a partner. BUT, everybody doesn’t see our relationship as such. Within 24 hours of my proposal, I received a glimpse of what life will be like for my children. Even though we received overwhelming love from multiple different people in our lives, the harsh reality of hatred within my own family was shown publically on social media. I appreciated the love and support we received from several family members (on both sides) but for some reason the hatred spoke 10x louder. I always knew the outside world had animosity towards interracial relationships but seeing that I felt the same energy with my own family was disheartening. In 1967, the Loving vs. Virginia Supreme Court case ruled that interracial marriage was constitutional. Almost exactly 50 years later and we are witnessing ourselves how this hasn’t changed for some people (black and white). I began to think to myself how harsh of a world my mixed child could be coming into. The black community won’t accept them because they aren’t black enough and the white community won’t accept them because they’re mixed with black blood. This was merely just a glimpse of the challenges that we will have to face and this has affected my desire to even have a wedding because of my nerves and fear of all the drama and animosity that may arise. However, I have faith that we will get through it together because our relationship is stronger than “color” and bitter individuals trying to tear down our happiness.
2 Comments
|
AuthorJustin Black
|